100 stories to go…

If some people are so hungry for a feeling of importance that they actually go insane to get it, imagine what miracle you and I can achieve by giving people honest appreciation this side of insanity.
~ Dale Carnegie


All you can hear is laughter.

Male and Female laughter, high and low pitched, shrieky, deep… all kinds of laughter that made for a beautiful sound to my ears.

Seated around a table, actually four tables that have been joined together to better accommodate the large crowd, a group of young professionals shared jokes, stories and lots of laughter.

I walked in late, the ambience was awesome and I stood at a distance and the one thing I thought, I will miss this people.


Every successful individual knows that his or her achievement depends on a community of persons working together. ~ Paul Ryan


They dedicated their after work time to appreciate me. (and a couple of my colleagues who are also moving on… but this is my story)

I wouldn’t be the person I am today in my career without these beautiful, mosaic crowd of my peers and seniors.

They have molded me by teaching, training, working with and supporting me all the years and here they were selflessly taking time off their rest hours to gather round and appreciate me.

The first eight years in my professional life and here I was saying goodbye to it.

Mixed emotions… I was happy I was moving but sad that this is all I knew.

They been my family for the better part of the last eight years, and one thing is for sure, each of them represented a print in my memories.

Some of my very special and lasting friendships were born here…


The making of friends who are real friends, is the best token we have of a man’s success in life.
~Edward E. Hale


Anyway as a gift I received a book, Chicken Soup for The Soul; On Being a Parent. 101 Stories. (I am a parent) – They got me a gift!! Aren’t these people awesome?

I managed to read the foreword and the first story; I have 100 stories to left to read.

And it dawned on me; This was just story number one, 100 more to go…

I have just but done one story in my career. Just like any foundation, it took time to be complete Eight years of hard work, great teams, awesome friendships, great customers , ridiculous queries and  of course ridiculous demands… but Eight years nonetheless. Eight years of learning, of being mentored and of being molded. Eight years of small and big triumphs, of satisfaction and of success. Eight years of growth in my personal, physical and career life. EIGHT YEARS.

My Story Number one is Eight years long… A milestone.

On to my Story Number 2 through to Number 101.


Continuity gives us roots; change gives us branches letting us stretch and grow and reach new heights.
~ Pauline R Kezer

This is to the next 100 stories…




The Pain. The Pen. Life.

It happens to everyone as they grow up. You find out who you are and what you want, and then you realize that people you’ve known forever don’t see things the way you do. So you keep the wonderful memories, but find yourself moving on. ~Nicholas Sparks

 Every time I sit down to write I realize that I am afraid the post may be too long, too open, too bitter or all of the above.

So today I want to thank the almighty because after a very long time I got the courage to write. I am not a good writer or even blogger by all standards, but I got the courage to get out of myself and look at life from outside of myself and write however plain.

So today am in traffic and with the car radio off I could practically hear myself think. That was despite the many tuk tuks that were around me, the crazy honking drivers and generally the noise of traffic.

What is life about?

Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards.~ Soren Kierkegaard 

Life is about giving and receiving. It’s in the giving that we appreciate others and it’s in the receiving that we feel appreciated. While all along I thought Life was about love, happiness and wealth. I am ready to admit that I was wrong.

All three aspects above are as a result of giving and receiving.

We often tend to give too much, or too little and receive too little where we gave too much or too much where we gave too little.

Recently I realized that I was okay in giving, I was happy giving and I gave whole heartedly, I was even willing to give more, But reality dawned on me that as much as I gave I never got back. Even in small doses. And I realized that it was not worth it.

You only go where you are appreciated. And you go quickly. Because Life only makes sense when you are appreciated and you get more zest to appreciate others.

Humanity detects that when you realise that a person or a cause can benefit more from someone elses gifts or givin then its only proper for you to allow them to receive wholly and to be happy because they can give back to them in appreciation.

You will find that it is necessary to let things go; simply for the reason that they are heavy. So let them go, let go of them. I tie no weights to my ankles ~ C. Joybell. C

With Love,


Of the Will and Atonement…

The beginning of atonement is the sense of its necessity.
Lord Byron

Today I heard such a profound story and thought I should share it.

In fact I heard three stories; of the three stories, this one was more profound. I think.

The story is told of a certain man named Man from a certain Town called A. Man was a very bad man. He had killed 99 people from Town A.

However in his journeys he developed a conscious and all of a sudden he started seeking atonement.

He met a villager who had no o limited knowledge of the religion, let’s call him Y. So Man approaches Y and asks him, “I have killed 99 people in my journeys, however I really want atonement, do you think Allah will forgive me?”

Y, because of his ignorance of religion answers, “ 99 are too many people, that’s too much blood, I don’t think you will ever be forgiven. In fact I am certain you will go straight to hell.”

Man was very incensed and thought to himself if that is the case then, what does it matter if its 99 or 100. So he went ahead and killed Y, bringing his count to 100.

Man continued his walk and just ahead he met another villager. A man who was a scholar in the religion. Let’s call this guy Scholar. So man approaches Scholar and asks him the same question, “I have killed 99 people in my journeys, however I really want atonement, do you think Allah will forgive me?”

Scholar, because of his knowledge of religion answers, “Allah is full of grace and Mercy, there is no amount of sin that he cannot forgive, if you really desire the atonement then he is sure to atone you of your sins. However where did you kill these people?”

Man Answers, “Right here in A”

Scholar then tells him that for him to get atonement Has to travel to the nearby town, B, because the blood of the 99 people will overshadow his request to the most High.
With that Answer, Man sets about his journey to B. without a word of goodbye to either his family or friends. He did not want to waste too much time I presume.

He ran, walked, jogged crawled all the way to B, as fate would have it, just at the border of A and B, Man fell down and died.
Immediately two angels descended, one the Angel sent from Heaven and the other from hell. Each claiming Man as theirs.

Angel of Heaven says, “this man really wanted atonement, he came all the way, it is evidence that he is a good man who felt bad about his ways and wanted to be rid of his sins.”

Angel from Hell says, “Whatever man, this guy did not get to B and even if he did, he had not asked for atonement as yet.”
Allah seeing what is happening sent an angel to come as a judge and decide on the matter. The Angel says, “Let’s measure the distance between where he is from and where he is going.” Being at the border the man was closest to B, hence the angel decreed that his desire for atonement was greater than his capacity to sin at that very moment.
Read the rest of this entry »

A life without regret…not in its entirety…

“Old times” never come back and I suppose it’s just as well. What comes back is a new morning every day in the year, and that’s better.
–George E. Woodberry

Today is the last day of the year 2012…I am thankful that I have seen this day!

SInce the 26th, i have been promising myself to post an appropriate post… but I have been too caught up with work and everything. For the first time in my career the holiday season was the busiest time of 2012…with short deadlines, impatient customers, increasingly incredulous demands…I made it though. I met all deadlines through stealth and resolve :-)…

I always say and believe that I have lived my life without regret. And that may be true. Over the last months though I discovered that there are some things I would do differently if I was to go back in time. Well here is my dark list;

  1. I would invite a little bit of abandon in my life…live a little carelessly at least once
  2. I would not give a hoot about the negative things that people said to me and of me. It’s their weakness that they can’t reconcile my awesomeness with their hideousness.
  3. I would have a stronger resolve in the things I set out to do.
  4. I would choose my University Major myself… I would then settle for Business Administration with two minors in Finance and Marketing
  5. I would see a specialist doctor for even the smallest complications
  6. I would read more books. And All genres too.
  7. I would loan money to friends and family judiciously
  8. I would teach myself how to budget and live by the budget.
  9. I would do my goals mid year and strive to achieve them so that they do not fall in the mediocrity of New year resolutions
  10. I would stand up for myself more than often, make my position known without sounding too defensive and confront all people who need to be confronted without fear or favor.

Had I done the above things I strongly believe, that my life would be different and not necessarily better, but different nonetheless. These are just aspects of my life that I learnt too late that I should have done more… Now, I have more dreams, bigger dreams, inspired by wisdom, wisdom from experience, experience from mistakes and life in general, and even if I do get to live once again for me to be as resounding as I am today, the same mistakes will have to be made.

As I move on to my new year, I would like to wish you a Happy new year, one that’s filled with situations you can convert to happiness, one whose hardships will be within your scope to handle and will only serve to make you more into the person you want to become. And that all God reserves a special channel for your prayers to be processed straight through.

In 2013 choose to change someone’s life in a positive way for it is only in this way that your life may be changed

In 2013 wear someone else’s shoes for a mile before judging them, for it is only in this way that you may also be tolerated.

In 2013 Use Self-preservation with carefulness to ensure that in the process you do not scar a society that is barely holding itself from the hinges of selfishness and unkindness that is the norm; for you cannot expect to have all your rights respected when you are infringing on another’s. even for a ‘just’ cause.

For 2013 , Dare to be Different, for it is in the difference that you create room to accomodate diversity and other peoples differences.

Whatever your prayer for 2013 is, please throw in a sentence that God gives me the desire of my heart…

I knew I had gotten old when I realized that I only have one wish, one prayer and one desire for the year 2013.

“I have no regrets in my life. I think that everything happens to you for a reason. The hard times that you go through build character, making you a much stronger person.”–Rita Mero

Happy new year my people.

With lots of Love,

I blow a million kisses to each one of you

Music and the pen…

Some may need to punch a wall or strangle a cat, some may need to slash their wrists of whiff some coke, some may go to the gym and some may cook, some may bury themselves to their work and some may sit still.

That’s diversity.

Everyone has their way of coping, their way of blowing off steam…

When you sit alone in silence, in the night, overlooking the ocean, the mountain or the city from a skyscraper, all alone, thinking of how you got there, that’s a reprieve for some of us. Listening to the silence of the world and the voices in your head.  Conversations getting intense , then they hush… a quiet down and then they drammatically rise again.

And when the voices are too noisy you drown them with some sad song… The irony is that the universe will conspire to give you exactly the mood you want! As if by some sheer luck when you switch on the radio the music is so on point… sad, mellow and the lyrics? Damn it!

Then  its all over and you feel the need to take a pen and write it all down. In the hope that it will make things better.

It does…

Your pen glides over the paper as a stripper on stage, the connection between the content of your literature and your emotions is palpable… The flow is magical and the inspiration is divine…Your tears are your ink…

The pen and the music blends with the solitude to bring out the positivity we all crave!  The explanations that we do not dare voice, The music and the pen are my wall to punch, they are my gym and they give me the ability to scream…It is then and only then that you know you can handle anything, because at the end of it all, its reduced to literature… under your command of the pen…

My pen and my music… Thank God for them!

– – – – = :( :( :( while ++++ = :) :) :)……..

Despite being alone in that location, the tree blossoms, the green flourishes… all because it chooses to focus on the sun that is its nourishment and gives shade to those weary…
Lesson Learnt: dont peg your happiness on numbers…peg it on your ability to use your situation to make others happy

While taking a drive in the interior of the Kenyan Coast province I came across this lonesome tree pictured above. It stood tall and gracious despite the harsh conditions of the area in which it grows. Behind it there is a foot path and apparently people usually take a  rest under it after a long walk. People from this area are not privileged enough to afford transport from one town to another, they have to walk. Hence this tree offers a shade to many people.

Yet this tree caught my attention. I had to stop by the side of the road and take a photo of it. I even walked to it and had a closer look at it. There was something about this tree. I took a photo so that I may later have a good look at it..

It’s not a special tree…nope its not. Its a simple mango tree. But for a reason, I kept this photo. Sometimes while going through my phone Istop by it and wonder what it is that drew me to it.

And Friday while I was looking at it I realised there are some things in life that we NEED and those are the things that reallymatter to us. The things we want only go to make us ‘feel’ happy but if we have the things we need and we appreciate those things then we become really happy.

This tree might think that  it would feel much happier to have others around it or to have someone pour water to its roots every sunrise, e.t.c. And yet it is actually picturesque and beautiful to a passerby like me and Godsent to those who so need its shade.

What the tree doesnt know is that all it needs is sunshine and the limited rain drops that is the condition of the area to blossom and even bear fruit.

And so Friday morning while in the office I thought, why am not myself this day? Is it because of the many issues that surround me?  Do those issues define me? No? Really… No! Then I challenged myself to be happy, to draw out all my positivity, the nature of me that makes me tick…And I did…And the result? Bliss….

I told my self, ” Self, This weekend throw out Miss Negative and make suweet suweet love to Mr. Positive…”. And I did just that…

Here are the lessons I learnt this past weekend

  1. Family is important; the joy of knowing where your family is and how they are doing is just great. But getting a visit from your lovely sister that you so dearly missed is even better…always….
  2. That it does not matter what you have been through or how tumultuous your times have been, being in the company of people who love you makes it all fade…
  3. Laughter is indeed the best medicine…
  4. There is NOTHING like too much sex… Nope…Never…. And Sex is a good thing people…it is!
  5. Lastly and why I chose to write this piece… positive thoughts attract positive energy which then attracts positive things to your life

God knows how I can sulk and be unhappy… negativity draws out my strength and uses it all up and renders me weak to be consumed by hate, jealousy, unforgiveness… it brings out the worst in me. Funny thing is instead of kicking it in the curb I suppress it and it goes ahead to eat at my health, and before I know it I have an ailment which can range from a small headache to an asthma attack.

Growing up everyone used to say to me, “Baby Girl why do you like laughing so much?”,Or the classic question “Do you ever get mad?”, I never understood why until just the last weekend; You see  it’s my body’s way of making me healthy. I smile much, laugh often and loud and I forgive easy… I also shun negative people and talk not in their presence and recant all negative reports whether consciously or sub consciously.

So going back to the weekend, given my last two weeks of negativity (will have you know some of it came from quarters that should ideally not affect me as much) this weekend I purposed to rather than suppress, I will exalt my most active positive nature. So I started with the laughing, the joking and polished my sexuality…. Lets just say it paid…in a big way…in all ways…

So going forward, other than the necessary things to worry about, I will not worry about other people’s intelligence or lack of and closer home I will not worry much about the tomorrow. The NOW I have, I LOVE. And the NOW I have is POSITIVE and that NOW is what makes me glow…

Have a positive day my people…